Women, Homelessness and Service Provision 19 many opted to access homeless and/or alcohol/drug treatment support services, often at a crisis point in their lives. A number of other women did not access domestic violence services because they felt their lives were not in immediate danger or because they feared that disclosing their abusive home situations to service professionals would exacerbate already volatile home situations. “I’d rather somebody else that was fearing their life to be there domestic violence refuge than me taking up a bed.” (Grainne, 31) “I never reported the violence because I would be killed worse if I reported the violence. If I got him partner locked up I would be killed stone dead.” (Liz, 38) In a smaller number of cases, women reported that they were reluctant to access domestic violence services because of the shame associated with the experience of domestic abuse and/or marital breakdown: “Seeking help in a refuge is like a stigma for our community and people are too ashamed to say these things” (Bina, 32). These women’s accounts highlight the hidden nature of domestic abuse as well as their reluctance to approach domestic violence services because of their fear of stigma, stereotyping and possible rejection by family members and/or local communities. “I don’t want to go and spread the word around that I was abused, I don’t want people to look at me and think, ‘Oh the poor thing, the victim’, you know? Because I am more than that.” (Delilah, 30) The decision to leave an abusive home situation was often prompted by encouragement and assistance from both informal and formal sources, including the police, social workers, parents and staff at their children’s schools, GP’s, friends, neighbours and/or family members. Immanuela, for example, told of the support she received from a number of individuals in relation to leaving her abusive partner. “She neighbour saw that I was being abused and she said, ‘You must leave your husband, I try to sort out something for you’. And she sorted me with the social worker, and social worker was saying to me that because I was never working here in Ireland, it doesn’t matter, ‘You have situation you cannot work, you are pregnant, you cannot work because you are depressed, we help you, we give you a home, we give you small money, you can find work, you can have her here, you can start life’.” (Immanuela, 29) Women tended to respond well to the efforts of domestic violence and/or homeless service providers when they did access these services. The Gardaí in particular were identified by a number as helpful at the time they were trying to leave an abusive partner in that they provided information about where to go and escorted them to a homeless or domestic violence service, in some cases. However, several women who had experienced domestic violence reported that they did not seek help from the relevant services because they feared that their children would be removed from their care, that they would not be ‘believed’, or that nothing would be done even if the violence was reported: “I went to the police … because partner was forcing himself on me and they said, ‘Your husband can’t rape you’ … I never went for help again, you know” (Donna, 35). Many of the women, particularly those who first left home during their teenage years, had embarked on a pattern of leaving and returning, often in the context of attempting to escape situations of domestic violence or abuse. Stephanie, who was sexually abused by her father
Women, Homelessness and Service Provision
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